answers

quotation sources:


 * 1) Lenny Bruce
 * 2) Mark Twain
 * 3) Mae West
 * 4) George Burns
 * 5) The Devils Dictionary, by Ambrose Bierce
 * 6) W.C.Fields
 * 7) Rodney Dangerfield
 * 8) George Carlin
 * 9) Woody Alan
 * 10) Charlie Chaplin
 * 11) Jack Benny
 * 12) Edgar Bergen
 * 13) Me. (actually it is one of my favorites, but its source is unknown"